IN PURSUIT OF HYGIENE Helen Razer CHICK LIT HUMOUR *NEW

Like so many midly neurotic, twenty something female citizens who never actually got around to finishing their arts degrees (oooh, but we are a largish demographic) had this misguided lust to articulate anger. Sadly, somewhere between the conceptual and practical processes, I sort of forgot what I was angry about. Or rather, I became angry at my anger, and shortly thereafter, if I recall correctly, angry at my inability to remember what I was angry about. And, frankly, just dman angry about my inability to buy a fetching frock in size 12.

Imagine what its like for poor Camille Paglia, who certainly does have the look of a woman in intensive beauty therapy. 'Camille, do you want Wine With Everything or Urban Decay Pigeon? And while we're at it, have you ever considred how your lurid brand of populist revolution is both reactionary and facile? And can I please have a go at your enormous eyebrow?

While I am tempted to hold The First Stone responsible for rewriting feminism to the point where it became about as unifying and useful to the girl in the street as a wonder bra, I'm not quite that small minded and brittle. There are lots of other folks to blame as well.

Nothing is sacred in this brilliantly ballistic offering from Tripe J star Helen Razer, co-author of the bestselling Thee Bears and a Chinese Meal.